High above

Published May 6, 2008

Was visiting a local carnival at Centerpoint mall in North York when I took this one

Info: Sony A100, 50mm, f/4, 1/2000, ISO 100

I let someone else drive my car today and it’s been a while since I’ve been in the passenger seat of my own ride. There’s something to say about watching things around you move without you having to do anything.

I think its time for me to unplug a bit. Realign, watch the stars, talk, breathe… all that stuff that I tend to take for granted. It’s funny that in a world so connected, often times I feel more distant. I’m not ashamed to say that I’ve felt a sense of isolation when MSN isn’t open. We live in a world that is more connected than ever, with the facility to see people and talk to them at any time of day, SMS, IM, whatever! We’ve even invented ways to communicate without directly communicating… facebook updates, twitter… cyberstalking at its best!

Yet it hit me recently that I’d trade a whack load of weak ties, for a small number of strong ties anyday. I’m getting tired, or maybe I’m getting old haha. I always joke that I use a mac now because it lets me do what I need to do and I don’t have to think about it anymore. So maybe letting someone else drive was a sign that I’m ready to trust in others more. Things are tough when you always want to be in control, like a perfectionist. I read one definition as:

“unable to feel satisfaction because in their own eyes they never seem to do things good enough to warrant that feeling”

Isn’t that sad? I don’t believe fit that description because I’m way too open minded and unwary to criticism, but still… some elements of wanting control are certainly a trait of a perfectionist!

I get this feeling that change is coming and things are going to be different soon. I don’t really have an explanation for that feeling, it just is. Maybe its hopeful optimism or maybe I just want to be set free.